Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Underage Dating

"You can follow them on Facebook – the failed attempts at love, I mean. Somebody is always changing their status from “in a relationship” to “single.” Unfortunately, a huge number of these disappointed lovers are too young to be legally married. I wonder sometimes if I am the only one who winces to hear a thirteen-year old speak with cavalier abandon of his or her “ex?” Since when is it considered healthy and acceptable for underage people to be in “relationships?” Just what do parents and educators expect to be the result of the romantic conquests of these middle-school children and young high school students? " Read More

The above is a good article about a problem I have watched for 20 years of working with teens. The constant dating and breaking up cycle sets up a pattern for their adult years. It desensitizes them and then when they become an adult it is easy to end a relationship.

Most parents, I find, don't have a plan for their child's dating future in place when their child is young, like early elementary. So when their daughter has a "cute" relationship with their "little boyfriend", the parents don't know how to respond when this cute relationship is months into it and obviously become very serious because their little girl has let all her friends get kicked to the curb as her life is absorbed with this boy, who she "loves so much". Then they don't know how to step in and draw the line as a parent because they let a seemingly innocent relationship go way too far.

You gotta have a plan. I do for my kids. And for my daughter . . . I own a couple of shotguns that I will sit on the porch and clean them if some boy starts to think he can hang around my girl.
My daughter won't date a boy until that boy is spiritually mature enough to be her spiritual leader. My sons won't date girls until they are spiritually mature enough to be the spiritual leader in the relationships.

Every date is a potential mate. Who is your kid dating? Do you have a dating plan in place? If not you should seriously consider getting a plan in place mucho pronto.

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When You Realize You Need a Reset

This morning in my morning quiet time I wrote the following:

 Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God...